Island Views - Fall 1998 - Additions to Murphy's Law

Additions to Murphy's Law

"The law of Volunteering"
If you dance with a grizzly bear, you had better let him lead.

"The Law of Avoiding Oversell"
When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.

"The Law of Common Sense"
Never accept a drink from a urologist.

"The Law of Reality"
Never get into fights with ugly people; they have nothing to lose.

"The Law of Self-Sacrifice"
When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last.

"Weiler's Law"
Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.

"The Law of Probable Dispersal"
Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.

"The Law of Volunteer Labour"
People are always available for work in the past tense.

"Conway's Law"
In any organization there is one person who knows what is going on. That person must be fired.

"The Iron Law of Distribution"
Them that has, gets.

"The Law of Cybernetic Entomology"
There is always one more bug.

"The Law of Drunkenness"
You can't fall off the floor.

"Heller's Law"
The first myth of management is that it exists.

"Osborne's Law"
Variables won't; constants aren't.

"Main's Law"
For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.

"Weinberg's Second Law"
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would have destroyed civilization.

Laurie Whyte
Local 951

*"The law of Volunteering"*	If you dance with a grizzly bear, you had better let him lead.
*"The Law of Avoiding Oversell"*	When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.
*"The Law of Common Sense"*	Never accept a drink from a urologist.
*"The Law of Reality"*	Never get into fights with ugly people; they have nothing to lose.
*"The Law of Self-Sacrifice"*	When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last.
*"Weiler's Law"*	Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.
*"The Law of Probable Dispersal"*	Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
*"The Law of Volunteer Labour"*	People are always available for work in the past tense.
*"Conway's Law"*	In any organization there is one person who knows what is going on. That person must be fired.
*"The Iron Law of Distribution"*	Them that has, gets.
*"The Law of Cybernetic Entomology"*	There is always one more bug.
*"The Law of Drunkenness"*	You can't fall off the floor.
*"Heller's Law"*	The first myth of management is that it exists.
*"Osborne's Law"*	Variables won't; constants aren't.
*"Main's Law"*	For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.
*"Weinberg's Second Law"*	If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would have destroyed civilization.